i didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
i didn't mean to fall in love but i did
and you didn't mean to love me back but you did
<3
i've been so emo-fied lately, especially at night. i can cry just for no reasons. the tears just flows out as and when it pleases to. i can cry when listening to songs (fine. emo songs to be exact.). i can cry through out the whole time watching p.s. i love you. (okay, that movie was touching.) except that i didn't because KinkyBunny would have laughed at me so hard.
but still, the main question is, why? is it maybe because i feel content now and i do not have any reasons to cry, and the tears just overflow? or is it possible that i'm hurting silently inside without knowing it, and i don't even know why?
something for me to wonder.
doing nothing but sitting at home and thinking about a thousand and one unnecessary things can really get me feeling depress. suddenly i feel bad about not being around on my birthday. LOLS. how random is that? occasions like birthdays, valentine's day, mothers'/fathers' days, anniversaries, etc. are pretty important to me. and i like it the old fashion way. for instant, everyone (family, loved ones) should be together during special occasions. presents are a must, if possible. also, there MUST be a cake for a birthday, or else if it wouldn't seem like a birthday at all. same goes to the flowers for valentine's day, and so on.
i will be away on my birthday and mothers' day (this year, mothers' day is just one day after my birthday), which means i won't be able to celebrate the two occasions with the family this year, and also next year, simply because i'll be in a far away land by then. maybe it's not a very big deal after all. and i know, it won't be that bad. but at this moment, when i'm emo-fied, every tiny little things like this seems huge, and it makes me feel bad. :(
oh boy. i know i have something more important to worry about, instead of tiny little things like these. i know i will feel way better after writing/typing all this down. in fact, i'm feeling better now. :) so, enough about negativity and emo stuff. goodbye.
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3:08 PM
